Angry Ninjas, Disastrous Confessions!
by Carlos of Suburbia
Summary: When Naruto tries to confess his feelings to Hinata, he ends up accidentally kidnapping her! Realizing he likes having power over her, he's faced with moral issues: Is it okay to have power over a human? When does selfless love become selfish lust? In turn, Hinata must decide between Naruto and her self-respect. Join the ninjas as they stumble through love to find these answers!


_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Nobody owns Naruto. That would be slavery. He is an independent young man who does not bend to the wills of other individuals._

_This fic takes place in an alternate universe where Naruto has a crush on Hinata, not Sakura. As for timeline, I'm not too sure. Let's just say during Shippuden, because I personally don't think most 12-year-olds (especially 12-year-old Naruto) are mature enough to support romantic relationships. Sorry if you think I'm wrong. Feel free to respectfully disagree. That said, I'm still in the Search for Tsunade arc, and therefore ignorant of the goings-on of Shippuden, so just chalk any continuity issues up to differences between the canon and alternate universes._

_And so, without further ado, I proudly present _Angry Ninjas, Disastrous Confessions!_ Enjoy the fic!_

Naruto paced back and forth, back and forth, pouring his teenage angst out to Sakura. The sun had gone down hours ago, yet still the patient kunoichi listened, her gaze following Naruto as though he were an orange pendulum. "She's just so smart and sweet and kind and freakin' _adorable_…." Naruto paused, staring off into space as though he were looking at some beautiful, unobtainable prize tempting him from the heavens. After a moment of internal wrestling, his shoulders slumped and he trudged over to Sakura, plopping down on a tree stump beside her. "Aw, who am I kidding, Sakura? Hinata could never fall for a guy like me."

Sakura looked down at her feet thoughtfully as she mulled it over. Naruto stared at the kunoichi and began to imagine what she would say:

_Oh Naruto, you're not _that_ bad!_

_Yeah, she's pretty far out of your league. Along with pretty much every girl ever. Sorry Naruto; looks like you're going to die alone and unloved._

_Hey, there are plenty of fish in the sea, Naruto! Kiba's sister seems pretty nice. Well, yeah, she licks herself in public, but I think you two'd be a cute couple!_

Instead, after a tense moment of thoughtful silence, Sakura quietly stood up, walked over to Naruto, reached out her hand…

_Wump!_

"_Ow!_ What gives?" Naruto rubbed the welt on his head left by Sakura's fist.

"Naruto, you dolt! You're about as dense as they come, aren't you?"

"Sakura, what are you talking about!"

"Didn't you ever get a clue that she _likes_ you?"

"You didn't have to-wait, wait, wait...She _what?!"_

"Oh, Kami! Think about it: The way she stutters when she's around you, the way she turns red and stares at her feet, how she faints when you show her unsolicited affection?"

"What! But I thought…but I thought that was just epilepsy!"

"Oh my…! Holy _crap_, you're clueless!"

Naruto's head was swarming with thoughts. _Hinata likes me? She really likes me? Is that possible? Is "liking Naruto" even a thing with girls? Man, she's got the cutest dimples! Well, I guess that'd explain a lot; I didn't think you could be a shinobi if you were epileptic. Does she sleep in a onesie? That'd be so cute! No! Focus, focus! Could I just _ask_ her out? Is it really that simple? Is it _ever_ that simple? There's gotta be a catch, right? Yeah, there's definitely a catch! Holy Kami, what if she curled her hair?!_

Naruto sat, thinking, thinking. Sakura could almost swear she saw smoke drifting out of his ears. Poor thing looked like he was going to hurt himself. He was making this way too complicated.

"So…you're telling me…" He began, "all I'd have to do…"

_Go on, go on..._

"…is just _ask _her out…"

_C'mon, you're on the right track..._

"…and she'd say…yes?"

"_YES!_ Oh, thank Kami, yes! You finally _understand__!_" Sakura cried, collapsing to her knees.

"She'd say yes?"

"Without a doubt!"

"Really!?"

"Honestly, she'd probably have another epileptic fit."

"So she _does_ have epilepsy!"

"You were doing so well, Naruto. Don't ruin the moment."

"Oh-sorry," Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "Well, guess I'd better get going, huh?" he said, bubbling all giddy.

"Um…go where, exactly?"

"To Hinata's! Duh! I gotta tell her!"

"Naruto, do you know how late it is? You can't go to the Hyuga compound at this time of night. It's crawling with guards right now. You'll get in trouble for trespassing. Maybe even killed!"

"Aw, c'mon, Sakura! I'm careful enough. Besides, isn't that just the perfect way to sweep a girl off her feet? Brave a daring journey into enemy territory, where the land is teeming with guards—"

"—who can see through walls up to 50 meters in a 360° radius—"

"—and sneak into her room through her window to confess your feelings for her. Just like in _Make-Out Paradise_!"

"You read _Make-Out Paradise_?"

"Ah, well, never mind that."

"Naruto, that book is a misogynistic piece of crap! It sets up totally unrealistic, unhealthy expectations for relationships!"

"_Anyway_, Sakura, I'm headed off. Wish me luck!" And with that, he disappeared into the trees.

Sakura sighed. Sometimes he did the dumbest things. He wasn't stupid. Not by a long shot. He had a brilliant strategic mind when he chose to use it-which didn't seem often.

She just hoped he'd live long enough to use it one more time.

Naruto silently slipped in through the Hyuga heiress's window. He figured it'd be a while before the guards figured out they were pursuing shadow clones; the clones knew to stay just outside the Byakugan's range, but just in case, they were shaped like random villagers, not him. Naruto grinned. And people called _him _stupid!

His dopey grin melted away once he saw her.

There she was, curled up in the fetal position under the covers, hair splayed clumsily across her pillow; lips parted ever so slightly; a small wet spot on her pillow by her mouth. She drools in her sleep. Precious. Naruto crept over to the side of her bed. The soft sound of her breathing was perfectly synchronized with the slow, rhythmic expansion and contraction of her chest. And her chest…oh Kami, stare at her face, stare at her face!

That wasn't hard to do; what with the holy glow of her smooth, porcelain skin amplified by the pale starlight, Hinata looked like one of the sacred moon spirits. She seemed so beautiful, so fragile in sleep, like a sculpture of spun glass. A part of him felt guilty that he'd have to break her away from such a sweet sleep. But then again, he figured that if Sakura were right, she'd find what he had to tell her more than worth it. He bent over her, placed a trembling hand on her shoulder, and whispered as he gently shook her: "Hinata? Hey, Hinata, wake up."

Hinata leaned her head back, curled into her Naruto's warm chest, staring into his brilliant blue eyes as he lovingly stroked her hair like a child. She knew it was a dream; what would ever make Naruto want to be this close to her? She tried not to think about that. She was here now, and that was real enough for her.

He leaned in close, making her heart flutter. His smooth, angular face was just inches for her. Kami, he's so beautiful. "Hinata," he whispered tenderly.

"Yes?" She breathed, drunk on the aroma of his cinnamon breath.

"Hey Hinata, wake up."

Wake up? What did that mean?

"Wake up, Hinata."

He began to shake her shoulder gently. Softly, gradually, he shook her world apart like one shakes sand off a picnic blanket.

She struggled to open her eyes, which seemed glued together. "Go back to sleep," they seemed to say. "Go back to Naruto." She was about to listen to them, when Naruto's voice whispered again, "Hey Hinata, wake up. I need to talk to you."

That voice wasn't a dream; it was crisp, clear, and very, very real.

And it was Naruto's.

_So how'd you like it? Just so you know, I'm about to go off to college, so updates should go from rare to super-rare. In the meantime, if you like what you see and want some more, make sure to review, favorite, or do something to let me know to keep it coming! _


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